Monday, November 06, 2006
Muddle-headedness
So far, so much in the secular world has been wondrous and fairly great. My class is doing well and though I have joined new classes, the people there are nice and friendly and I have little trouble getting along with them. New project groups have been formed and my new subjects have more or less been introduced to me that I may know how boring they are =P
I can't wait for the beginning of year 2 when Culinary Practicum shall be introduced as a core subject and perhaps only when I enter the kitchen will I find true joy in school. But every blessing seems to come with a compromise. As I enter into Year 2 I will be apart from my current class, though a number of them will follow me up. I'm quite sad to think that well, I am not going to be able to enter kitchen with 1Jo2, the class that has brought me much joy and laughter, taking away stress in difficult times.
For now, projects can be quite tiring since they are all about business and management, research and surveys. On top of having to focus on subjects that I don't really enjoy, also I seem to be struggling in some areas of friendship that lie beyond the school itself. Everyday I walk in stress and worry, waiting on the promises of He who is faithful to come to pass and that may take several years! Still patience is a good habit to cultivate.
Still...how wish I that everything were so swiftly solved and that my life can be once more filled with joy and wonder, to be happy and to be filled, to live out life according to one purpose: And that is to live it to the fullest according to His will.
I try not to worry, to focus, but it can be so difficult, when at the same time facing friendship and relationship crisis that all my energy alone is spent dealing with such issues. Perhaps it is but folly and I should greater wisdom in lifting it up to the Heavens that all my worries shall be apart and away. But there will always be a heaviness of heart that will not go, a genunine joy that will not come and an affliction is never forgotten. Peace is momentarily.
And all know, to deny your feelings would be to destroy yourself. How? When shall my joy and deliverance come? I need only persevere and hold fast to the Promises lest I be swept away by the tide that comes and the storm that rages.
Class is starting. Farewell. =)
Posted by The Inflamed at 11:57 AM
